The following is an account of my attempt to install and use some software.

In the past, I liked VMWare and recommended it to people frequently. Now I am confused and frightened.

1. I go to download the file, and am prompted to login.
2. I don’t know my password, so I reset it.
3. I get my password via email, plain text of course.
4. I login.
5. I download the tar and extract it.
6. I run the perl script and start the installation.
7. I answer a tedious series of questions that I don’t have the proper knowledge to answer, in the command line. Luckily, they have defaults which I choose every time. There are a bunch of questions, I slap away at the enter key. I am thankful for the defaults, however I wish they didn’t ask unless prompted to, but whatever.
8. I get to the part where I need enter my serial. This is free, why the hell do I have to enter a serial.
9. I have no idea what my serial is.
10. I check my email, to see if I got anything from them after downloading, which I did.
11. The email does not contain a serial, rather, it has an invitation to go ahead and activate my license and download VMWare server. I think “wtf? I already downloaded this.”
12. I click the link, perhaps once activated, they will give me this serial.
13. I am prompted to login. I am already logged in, I can even access my account. Again, my thoughts go to “wtf?”
14. While in my account, I notice a “Find Serial Number” link. I think “goody”
15. I receive a “No Matching records found. Please refine your search.” error.
16. I fiddle with their search form to no avail.
17. I say fuck it, go back to my email, and click the activate and download link, and login using the form provided.
18. I receive a 404. Based on the URL, they appear to be trying to make me take some sort of survey. I’m pissed.
19. I drop my cookies, and try the form again, hoping it was just some random survey that I perhaps might avoid. It 404’s again.
20. I hit their knowledge base. I search for “serial”. The first result is: Locating VMware Serial Number online (1005509)
21. They tell me where to go and that my serial will be there. I am hopeful, but already suspicious.
22. I go there, there is a table there for serials, but there doesn’t appear to be anything in it. I suspect idiocy, so I look at the HTML, still nothing there.
23. There other option is to register a new account. I again say “fuck it”, use a different email and register a new account.
24. I get logged in and get the 404 again. PISSED.
25. I try again, and it works, sweet gravy I have a serial.
26. I slap the serial into the terminal and finish the installation.
27. I save the output, just in case I missed some useful information.
28. I want to start the application. I check my menus, there is nothing new, anywhere. “Thats annoying, oh well” I think.
29. I head back to the terminal, and enter “vmware”.
30. Its doing something, awesome.
31. Its opening firefox, wtf…
32. URL is https://127.0.0.1:8333/ui/, wtf…
33. “What is this for?” I think. I try logging in with my login information for their site. No dice. I try logging in with my system user information (thinking it was retarded but worth a shot), again, no dice.
34. I give up on that thing. I assume I am missing the actual application.
35. I head back to their knowledge base, trying to think of something less retarded to search for than “how do I start it?”
36. I dig around a bit. I am disappointed once again.
37. I glance over the log I saved, paying special attention to the end, where I assume there might be a clue of how to start it. Nothing useful.
38. I dig around in my system looking in the bins and find nothing useful again.
39. Just to relieve myself I google how the fuck do i start vmware server 2, I find someone else who doesnt like it (but managed to use it!), however nothing useful.
40. I figure this has to be that stupid localhost login, I head back to the terminal, run “vmware” and look at the login
41. I google wtf vmware infrastrucutre web access
42. First result is a pdf user guide for this thing, I don’t click because I no longer trust these fuckers. A few results down is “What’s the Login User Name and Password for VMWare Server 2.0 …”, I click it.
43. read… read… quote from page:
    

    What login user name and password to use? This probably your first installation of VMWare Server 2.0, and even if you have installed VMWare Server 1.0 before, it never ask for creation of any user account or its user ID or password during installation of whatever versions. And searching up and down in Start Menu’s VMWare Server program folder doesn’t reveal any program to create or manage user’s login name for VMWare console too.

    . Amen.

44. Turns out you need to login as the system administrator. Wait, didn’t I already assume that that was retarded but try it anyways because I was desperate? Yes I did.
45. After some more googling, I determine that I must login as root. Immediately after reading this I say to myself, “Wait a minute…. ubuntu doesn’t have a root login….”
46. I can’t login because it requires a user that doesn’t exist in any meaningful sense. God damnit.
47. I try it anyways, It doesn’t work.
48. After more googling I find this which quotes this:
    

    Because Ubuntu does not use the root user account we also need to setup access for your main user. Replace root with your username on line 10 of: /etc/vmware/hostd/authorization.xml (ACEDataUser).

49. I think “Ain’t that some shit.” and do what it says.
50. The guide recommends restarting. This is a *nix, I shouldn’t have to restart for this bullshit.
51. ..but i have no idea what needs needs stopped/started so I log out and back in, hoping it will work.
52. It doesn’t. I curse. I restart.
53. I try to login. It works. I am angry and relieved.

Closing thoughts.

1. I haven’t even used it yet, and probably won’t. If my install was any indication, they didn’t just take a step back, they tripped over a stump and fell down a well with this one.
2. I don’t want to use a shabby web interface for something I used to have a reasonable application for.
3. I am already logged on to my system. wtf am I logging in to?
4. This is apparently not a beta at this point.
5. I am starting to feel like they intentionally fucked over VMWare server so people would buy VMWare Workstation.
6. Hello VirtualBox, please don’t abuse me.